rules for arguing

i choose to try to stay on subject-and dont put down your partner's relatives as my rules in a relationship. i belive that just leaves inner emotional damage because the person can start losing self interest on themselves and there own family. if my partner would argue with me and compare me or say i am the same as my family member i will know he isnt the type of person i would like to be with for the rest of my life. my second rule i have is that i will express what i want instead of bitching on what i dont want in other words i will express my ideas and suggestions to my partner when i have to. i belive my relatonship will end up how i wanted it using this rule because i know now how important it is to share those type of ideas